A D V E R T I S E M E N T
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A D V E R T I S E M E N T
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Astrology
ARIES (March 21-April 19): I enjoyed Matrix Reloaded, but I hope you won’t see it or any film like it this week. It was loud, frenetic, pounding, bewildering, and epic — the exact opposite of what you need right now. You will thrive instead on intimate, subtle pleasures; you will come alive with understated, soulful influences that are full of nuance. The experiences that will lead you to your best destiny will awaken your sensitivity and move you to meditate on lyrical truths.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the series finale of Touched by an Angel, Monica is offered a promotion. All these years she has struggled to help bumbling humans climb up out of the gutter; now she can move up to the cushy job of supervisor. But she turns down the gig, choosing instead to keep redeeming the ragtag multitudes. I believe you’ll come to a comparable juncture in your own life during the coming months, Taurus. One path will lead to more comfort and prestige; the other will bring challenges and surprises. The sooner you start ruminating about it, the more likely it is you’ll do what’s wisest for the long term.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You’re in a phase when you may be tempted to start food fights at fancy dinner parties, wrap toilet paper around trees, and regard the juvenile delinquents of South Park as worthy role models. I hate to discourage you from indulging this instinct for uproar, since so much of it could be fun and liberating. Therefore, I’m going to authorize you to go right ahead. But please keep a fraction of your adult brain working in the background, ready to step in and halt the proceedings if you’re ever about to, say, imitate the kids’ “How to eat with your butt” routine for your boss.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): If you’re swallowed whole by a whale or a dragon this week, don’t panic: It’s much better than being chewed into little pieces first. And according to my reading of the astrological omens, while you may spend a few days in the belly of the beast, you will eventually be, uh, expelled intact out the other end. Then it’ll just be a matter of navigating the path back home. The entire experience will no doubt be humbling, but it will also have the salubrious effect of scouring you clean of a whole mess of karma.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “Can you find an imperfection on Halle Berry? We can’t.” So writes Hollywood.com’s Scott Huver about the Oscar-winning beauty born under the sign of Leo. And how does Berry herself feel about her looks? “To be totally honest,” she was quoted, “most of the time I think I’m ugly.” I absolutely forbid you to exhibit this kind of self-abasement in the coming week, Leo. You may not, under any circumstances, denigrate your own gorgeous radiance. It’s crucial for both yourself and everyone you encounter that you celebrate your magnificence.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Nothing worse could happen to one than to be completely understood.” So said pioneer psychologist Carl Jung. If you think that’s true, you should take action immediately, because you’re in imminent danger of being well understood by at least two people. If on the other hand you’re confident you can handle the odd sensation of being seen for exactly who you are, do nothing other than what you’re already doing.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Marriages in India are usually arranged by relatives, and most couples who wed come from the same religion or caste. There are daring rebels who ignore those customs, though, and marry for love. One of their champions has launched a new political party, the Lovers’ Green-Globalist Godfree-Humanist Party. “Only those who love can effectively change society,” the founder says. I bring this up, Libra, because it’s a perfect moment for you to launch your own Lovers’ Party. You have a growing knack for bringing intimacy and tenderness into political struggles. When helping your tribe deal with its dilemmas in the coming weeks, you’ll be able to summon ingenious expressions of compassion.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): I dreamed that if I hoped to compose an accurate horoscope for you, I’d have to go to the Outback Steakhouse. Since I don’t eat red meat, I felt a bit irked. But I’ve learned over the years not to ignore a direct order from my dreams and that it’s not enough just to go through the motions. So I obeyed with an open heart, dropping all my vegetarian sensitivities as I devoured an item described as “a serious burger for warriors only.” By the end of the meal, with my charts spread before me, I’d intuited the advice you need: Seek out encounters that are as unlike your usual inclinations as this one was for me.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In the generic sci-fi movie on tv last night, the hero’s spacecraft happened upon the interplanetary equivalent of a junkyard. Aging shuttlepods and out-of-commission satellites floated around a decrepit space station. Soon a salesman appeared on the ship’s viewscreen, trying to convince the hero to browse through his extensive collection of valuables, gathered from many different planets. “Take a look,” the huckster chirped brightly. “You may find something you never knew you wanted!” Those words or something similar will be coming your way from the entire universe this week, Sagittarius.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “History is made out of the failures and heroism of each insignificant moment.” Franz Kafka’s observation has special significance for you right now, Capricorn. Every little action you take will have unimaginable weight, and the cumulative effect of your many little actions may alter conditions you’d assumed were impervious to change. Even your passing thoughts and idle fantasies will have more influence than usual to shape your future. Until June 20, there will be no such thing as a trivial detail for you. My advice? Act as if each moment is a promise of the life you want to be living next October.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “The universe is full of magical things,” said British novelist Eden Phillpotts, “patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.” It’s another way to express my belief that life is a conspiracy to shower us with blessings, but most of us have developed ingenious strategies for eluding those blessings. The good news is that your wits have recently grown sharp enough to detect magical things that were previously invisible to you. You will soon rise up and divest yourself of one of your main methods for avoiding joy and success.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): I’m of the opinion that the psychological problem known as multiple personality disorder is merely the pathological version of a normal phenomenon. Most well-integrated people have a variety of selves, and any one may reign supreme at a given moment. The difference: In healthy folks, each of their many selves is in pretty good shape and on friendly terms with all the others. With these thoughts as an introduction, celebrate your own flourishing multiplicity in the coming week. It’s time to throw a party for your entire community of selves!
Homework: What’s the most important truth you keep forgetting about? Testify at www.freewillastrology.com.
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